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Butterflies and Bliss
AC Training Chamber This stark, spacious chamber is well reinforced and shielded to stand up to the strain of many practice bouts. A gleaming training drone stands in one corner of the room, ready for work. The walls are sheathed in reflective alloys, allowing the combatants to observe their motions and progress. The training room is set way different this time. The holographics have been completely reprogrammed to show a wide open field. It looks like earth in some random mountainous region. Focus is sitting in the wide open field where you would think Julie Andrews would spin by singing about the sound of music. But no, it's peaceful and serene. Focus is sitting in the lotus position as a few butterflies are perched on his white form. Seeking to further his aim and focus (tehehehe) of his martial sword art, Specter creeps into the Training Chamber. Less for actually intending to be sneaking along, but more out of habit.. in the past, on Coludarr, he was on constant vigil.. constant alert. Fate has it, it's a difficult habit to break. Padding through the large archway, the albino Autobot immediately notices the changes to the room.. but remains silent. Optics focused on the figure in the middle of the field, Specter merely observes for now. Combat: Specter slips into the shadows and out of sight... A single butterfly, a yellow one, flutters off of Focus. He picks up on the disturbance the creature made. He opens himself up to his surroundings expanding his awareness outward instead of inward for meditation. His optics, white and blank as they are, give a small shudder and flicker. Focus lifts his bowed head, causing the rest of the butterflies to flutter off of him. "It appears we have a visitor." he says softly, "Or is this more than it seems?" Combat: Focus searches for Specter. Combat: Specter has been found! As the yellow butterfly drifts through the air, fluttering ever so softly.. Specter is caught off-guard, out in the open staring like a simpleton! It's not often he's found out so easily, but then again.. the visuals from the field work on his senses, in a sort of calming sensation. Hard to explain, he simply feels.. more at ease. "Apologies, Focus. I had merely come down for some.. practice." Specter rambles off, regaining his bearings. "I did not intend to interrupt.." he trails, giving a slight bow and turning around towards the door. Focus shakes his head, "Not at all, wait wait..." he says while lifting to his feet. "Come...sit. If practice is what you seek, I can provide it." He gestures to a spot in front of where he was just sitting. "I would not deny someone seeking knowledge or skill, under most circumstances. Please, tell me what you seek." Curiously straight forward, something Specter hasn't found readily available since his return. Most other Autobots are caught in the hustle and bustle of warfare, far too busy moving too and fro to humor a relic like him. "Acknowledged." the albino Autobot nods, taking the seat and casting a curious glance at Focus' lotus style position. "I seek.. this." he waves around him, referring to the serene background simulation.. then finally to Focus. "Centering of one's.. aggression. Sight beyond physical.. sight." Focus tilts his head, listening to Spector, then considering his words carefully. "Agression by itself is not evil. It is a useful and has a purpose, as does all emotional states. To deny those emotions is to deny yourself. But, you can learn how to channel them, yes. I do not know if you can learn sight beyond physical sight though. That, brother autobot, would take a fair amount of skill in circuit-su. May I...?" He reaches up gently with an open palm and places it on Specter's chest. "...your su is strong. There is no denying that. I can sense it within you. But it is raw and unrefined, like a gem freshly dug out of the ground." "My.. su?" Specter repeats, glance down at Focus' hand on his chest. "I apologize Master Focus, but the term escapes me." he chiefs out, analytical mind getting right back into gear. "What is it exactly?" Focus sets it palm back down on his lap and smiles at the term, master. He nods slowly. "To answer your question in simplest terms, 'su' is our life force. Without it, we could not function. It allows us to use all of our abilities. Be it using a weapon, transforming, or just the simplest act of thought. So Circuit-su, is the act of using that energy. Not in any dramatic way however." He smiles and chuckles, "If you look up Circuit-su in some historical texts, it accounts masters who have projected beams of pure energy, or even sucked the very su from other living beings. Exaggerated accounts, most of them anyway." "Exaggeration, possible. Yet I was taught that all accounts, fiction or non, have a kernal of truth in them.. one basic fact. An origin, if you will." Specter spouts out, trying now to replicate the sitting position that Focus is in. He more or less gets it, just not very gracefully. "I would like to enlist in your aid, Master Focus. I believe you have many lessons to impart.. to aid in my function." Specter rambles out like a robot, cold.. calculated. Focus hurms thoughtfully, "I see..." while rubbing his chin. "...and what would you say if I said, no? How would that make you feel?" Focus reaches into his hip compartment and pulls out a small flask and some small cups. He sets each down on the grass while listening to the answer. A surprising reply, but one that wasn't unexpected either. Specter mulls the thought, glancing down and away. There is only one recourse, the Autobot surmises.. one response. "The only answer I can fathom.. is to accept your decision and respectfully remove said request." he replies matter-of-factly, in a monotone even voice. Though his mind is a torrid affair of confusion and rejection. Focus pours both cups full of energon tea, not really looking at anyone. He just knows where they are and never spills a drop. Focus's tone is a bit irritable, which is out of charcter for one so calm, "So, you 'would' search for an answer, even though your canned acceptance would suffice? Would you even want to know 'why' I might say no? Rejection is a hard thing to face, even if you do accept it." He drops the irritable tone for a second and says, "Here, have some tea...it's very soothing for the neural processors." "Reasons.. not warranted." Specter replies, still the simple single-tone voice.. devoid of passion or feeling. Accepting the cup of tea, the Autobot holds it out in front of him while he continues. "Of course I would perform several inventories and come to numerous conclusions of my own, wittling away at the list with basic intuition.. finally singling out one reason, over the others." Taking a tiny sip, Specter coughs a bit before continuing. "After self-discipline and correction of unwanted.. trait, I would submit the request once more." Focus tilts his head to listen, smiling at that. "If you needed self-discipline to let me teach you to center your aggression, then you clearly would need my teachings." He sets the cup down, "You seem to be unemotional. If that is natural programming or something happened to you to make you like you are today, I cannot say. But, my students have drive, passion, and emotions. Circuit-su is about passiveness and centering yourself. You claim to want to center your aggression, but either you've buried it so far down that you cannot reach it, or you never had any to begin with. Now tell me, which is it? Do you get mad? If you do, we can work to control it." "Do not pretend to inform me of -my- aggression!" Specter snaps off, in a quite opposite polarity of his usual detached demeanor. It's fairly obvious that he's been burying the feelings, the imagined rejection, the abandonment, the torture. It's helped him focus on the work, the faction, the struggle. It's obviously not working. "I.. apologize, Master Focus." Specter gasps, taking another sip of energon tea. "I must confess, I'm usually not this upfront.. with comrades." he admits, taking another sip. Focus lifts his head in surprise, even Focus can be taken back by the outburst. "You do not need to apologize, it is the reaction I was hoping for." He gives a thumbs up and smiles, "You passed. I will teach you basic Circuit-su. I could not teach someone who wouldn't show their emotions. Now that I see you can, I will teach you some of what I know. By doing that, we can help you control your aggression instead of burying it." He picks up his tea cup and sips at it lightly. "That was all a.. ploy? A ruse to have me react in a.. crass manner?" Specter sounds astounded at the thought. He's not really used to being tested, prodded, poked.. in such a casual manner. Usually it's a bit more discreet, a bit more.. professional. Looking like he's about to speak again, Specter instead stifles his question and takes another sip of tea. Delicious tea!! Focus gives a long slow nod, "Yes, I apologize about tricking you. But I needed to know. You cannot find your center if you never had one to begin with." He finishes his tea and relaxes. "I am just glad you did not try to attack me." he says with a smile. Specter nods slowly, wondering if indeed a physical attack was the intended result of said trick. "It is.. alright. I will try to, unmask my past and aggression." he blathers out, trying to lose the unemotional manner. Focus sets his cup down and says, "You must take these things slowly so you do not become engulfed in your anger though. I think the humans call these, baby steps. But for now, let us just enjoy the scene in here. Shall we?" He tenses, then relaxes letting the few tense moments before wash out of him like bad fuel oil. Specter nods, studying Focus closely. Not only to match his movements, but as to not have to question him during the intense focus. Tensing his frame, the memories and feelings wash up from the small dark hole Specter hid them in.. Fortress Maximus, a cruel twisted shade of his usual form is crushing his lasercore. Sentinel Prime, in the same fair mirror distortion as Fortress Maximus, slaps him on the back.. spilling enerhol right over Specter's head. Finally, distorted mobs of Coludarians give chase after the Autobot, his legs turning to jelly beneath him. All drawn to the surface, these embedded and hidden feelings drain out of him.. like the water being wrung out of a sponge. A calming effect washes over him, like the tide at a beach.. coming in to collect something, only to be swept back out to the ocean.. from wence it came. "Comforting." Specter whispers, before resuming the meditation.